I have used the only screenwriting format and layout that is available in professional film, therefore I have paid respect to the overall screenwriting conventions that have been formed throughout much experience and growth of film. This was by writing the screenplay with features such as the slug line/scene heading formatted in only one way which is with a capitalized font, INT.EXT, where the scene is and is it in day or night time? and then the character name, dialogue and action.
To pay more attention to screenwriting conventions, I should focus on the authenticity of the world as being stranded in the middle of nowhere by a potential boyfriend, being hit by him, being picked up by a stranger and trusting him, accepting a flask of unknown liquid and getting home safely is something that is very unbelievable to a lot of people and isn't easy to relate to, due to it not being a common occurrence.
How does the script adhere to the guiding principles of the TEN POINT PLAN?
Title - I still need to finalise a name. But the dominant name for the title position for me at the moment is 'In Your Eyes' because firstly, it shows the audience an ambiguous ending and therefore the story is only decided by the single audience member alone and secondly, because 'In Your Eyes' is to show the girls worries of the man and that she is constantly trying to understand the guys motives through even the smallest details such as body language and is therefore questioning everything he does and therefore relating towards the popular phrase 'look me in the eyes and tell me the truth'.
Genre/Tone - The genre is Social Realism as well as a sub-genre of Thriller due to the continuous building of tension. The tone used in the film is dark and mysterious due to the type of character Guy 1 is represented.
Setting - The setting for my film is a quiet country road, but a lot of the film is inside the guy's car and I should focus on describing the mise-en-scene in his car to enhance his character authenticity.
Main Character - The main character is the guy as he is in the film throughout the whole of it. The story however, does focus on the girls problem of being stranded and her suspicions of the man, this therefore creates an interesting perspective for the audience and her story is more interestingly told through the mans perspective.
Want/Need/Obligation - As the film maker i am deliberately writing mystery into the design of my character, keeping his desire opaque and unclear. Deep down he needs a contact of some kind, even if we don't know what that is - he wants her in the car. He isn't driving around with strange things in his car. He is stopping and transiting individuals from one point to another and the reason is remained disclosed. Trying to develop a tension between something that is deeply sinister and and something that is quirky and innocent. He is being opportunistic, he has committed no crime and takes a photograph. The way the project is constructed shows it as eerie behavior and explores the tension between threat and innocuousness - this is the backdrop of the want/need/obligation.
Want - he wants her in his car and a desire to preform this ritual, everything from the atmosphere he creates in his car and the sequence of the event from when he first makes contact of her with the printing of the Polaroid.
Need- He needs contact that goes against the norms of what contact should be 'so called' healthy human interacting - contact of his own terms. Hes not a stranger by the end of it because he knows where she lives. Ultimately this could be a ritual as there is no commitment to see her again.
Obligation - To help her and release her at the end of the journey. If he is not going to be criminalized by his actions,
Opposition - The opposition is the girls reaction to the guy, but coincides to his ritual as he would prefer it this way.
Catalyst for Change - Everything ends well with the girl arriving home safely after the high tension in her fearing for her safety and then the protagonist takes a picture of her walking to her house without her knowing.
The girl goes to smoke and he refuses, she doesn't listen and smokes anyways when she gets out it messes up his Polaroid with the smoke covering the lens and also a bike gets in the way of the picture.
Climax - Just as the audience believe in the good intentions of the protagonist as he drops the girl home safely and the climax of the tension drops, he takes a Polaroid picture of her without her knowing and suspicions of the audience rise.
Resolution - There isn't a clear resolution for the audience, the audience must decide for themselves with the evidence provided - similar to The Most Beautiful Man in The World.
Themes - One of the themes included in my script is subconscious influences by society today, meaning the distrust of strangers due to the heavily advertised danger of it in the media. Another theme included in my script is appearance vs. reality as she isn't given too much to work with due to him being so illiterate/socially incapable and having no history of the man, therefore she can only really judge his actions. Finally, there is a theme of Trust vs. Suspicion as she can't completely trust him as he is still only a stranger.
Does every scene reveal something new? Break down the scenes using the STEP OUTLINE to demonstrate how each is a consequence of the previous scene and in addition brings a new and significant development.
SCENE 1
What happens?
GUY#1 drives past a couple fighting on a country road at mid-day, he stops his car further down the road without them knowing and watches. GUY#2 punches the girl and he speedily drives off as she is knocked out and stranded in the middle of nowhere. Once she is knocked out, GUY#1 starts to make origami.
What is revealed that is significant to the plot?
All of the characters are introduced to the plot. Tension is created early on with the strange location, excessive violence and strange behavior from both of the guys to the girl. Both of the guys already hold some sort of power over her. She drinks from the flask, which the liquid in it is assumed to be hot chocolate but isn't clarified to her or the audience and therefore we suspect it could be drugged.
What is revealed that is significant to the audience's understanding of the characters?
The girl is seen as the victim and in desperate need of help and the guy is seen as strange, creepy and mysterious. This helps the audience understand why both of the characters do certain things, for example when the girl gets into a stranger car - it is only plausible because she has been hit and is stranded. The origami could be art related telling us that he is an artist, or it could just add to his creepiness.
Is there an indication of significant theme?
The only significant theme that is shown is strong vs. weak as the girl is seen as very weak due to being injured and GUY#1 is seen as godly as her well being is now in his hands.
SCENE 2
What happens?
The girl regains consciousness and is awoken by a pair of bulky black shoes, a blanket and a flask. She accepts the help from this stranger, takes a drink from the flask and gets into his car after he offers to take her home. Before the stranger (GUY#1) gets into the driver seat, she investigates his car so she can learn more about him but this is only a quick search as he gets into the car shortly after her. He asks her to put on her seat belt and she is still over whelmed and so the tension builds. He begins driving and the girl starts to ask him about origami in the back of his car, which he says is his sons and she feels a bit safer as she learns he is a parent - but he was lying. But this quickly changes after he takes a different route to what she is telling him.
What is revealed that is significant to the plot?
The girl drinks from the flask with the unknown liquid inside, GUY#1 offers to help the girl in need, the dialogue used by GUY#1 is very short this could be because he is illiterate or socially awkward, GUY#1 asks her to put the seat belt on and he is seen as threatening to the girl because of his to-the-point dialogue, he lies to the girl about the origami he made earlier and he takes a different road to the navigation the girl was telling him to; these are all significant pieces of information revealed to the plot and are all building tension throughout.
What is revealed that is significant to the audience's understanding of the characters?
The overbearing kindness of the guy creates a creepiness about him, the girl is very desperate and therefore easily trusting, the guy is revealed to be either illiterate or socially awkward and the girl finds this threatening as she can't work him out, the guy lies to the girl but she doesn't know and he takes a different navigation route to what the girl says, which makes her unnerving towards his intentions and she begins not to trust him again.
Is there an indication of significant theme?
Strong vs. weak as he still holds the power, appearance vs. reality as the audience is seeing one side and the girl is constantly seeing mixed signals, trust vs. suspicion as she cant fully trust a stranger due to the current media today always advertising stranger danger and also the fact that he is overbearingly trying to help her is a strange situation.
SCENE 3
What happens?
GUY#1 gets out of the car and the girl panics as she fears for her safety due to him disobeying her directions. She searches the car for an escape after he locks it and she finds some Polaroids in the glove box of the car. She starts to drift in and out of consciousness, which could be due to the punch earlier or the drink in the flask she drunk. The man then gets back in the car and she panics trying to shut the glove box and it jams a bit. As she is falling in and out of consciousness she murmurs directions to the guy.
What is revealed that is significant to the plot?
The tension is constantly building as the girl is becoming more and more scared of the guy. She finds some Polaroids of houses, which increases her suspicions and the abnormality of him. But this could also just be a reference to his artistic abilities. She is drifting in and out of consciousness and it could be suspected that this is from the flask but could also be just because she got punched. The man gets into the car without doing anything to harm her, but she is freaking out still and the tension is building as she struggles to put away the Polaroids. Whilst she falls out of consciousness she murmurs directions to her house, although she isn't aware she is doing this.
What is revealed that is significant to the audience's understanding of the characters?
The Polaroids are very significant as we can begin to understand an artistic persona of the guy and not everything about him seems as creepy, but there are still suspicions. Nothing more is really understood about the girl as this seen is more of an investigation of the man, all that is understood is that she feels in danger and therefore the
Is there an indication of significant theme?
There is themes of strong vs. weak, drug abuse, appearance vs. reality and trust vs. suspicion.
SCENE 4
What happens?
The girl regains consciousness and awakes in front of her house. She is confused as she didn't realise she had given him directions when passing out and is creeped out at how he knew where she lived. She gets out confused and walks to her house. The guy then takes a Polaroid picture of her house.
What is revealed that is significant to the plot?
The girl ends up arriving at her door unharmed and the guys intentions begin to slightly unveil as he takes a picture of her house, however they still remain unclear.
What is revealed that is significant to the audience's understanding of the characters?
The audience begin to understand that the guy is not just 'kind and helpful' as he does have ulterior motives as he takes a picture of her house.
Is there an indication of significant theme?
There is themes of strong vs. weak, drug abuse, appearance vs. reality and trust vs. suspicion.
Does the narrative progress cinematically and with minimal dialogue? Explain how it progresses cinematically rather than with dialogue. How do visuals drive the narrative forward at points? How does sound drive the narrative forward at points? How are visual elements (e.g. aspects of mise-en-scene) used symbolically?
The narrative does progress majorly through the use of visuals rather than dialogue, this was achievable, authentic and effective due to making one of my characters concussed and the other either illiterate or socially incapable (depending on how the audience interpret him). The effect this gives is that it allows me to internally direct with the use of camera and exploiting the emotions of my characters with uncomfortable intimate close-ups of sexually provocative body-parts (primarily the lips of the girl) as this will allow my audience a perspective of the actual situation rather than watching from a stand-point. However, the dialogue that I have planned to use is very minimal and to the point; for example, 'Home?' is said by the man very straightly as if the situation isn't strange enough and therefore this shows a strong use of cinematic representation through his stiff bodily and facial expressions and small but meaningful dialogue to progress the film. Throughout the film, I have only created eleven pieces of dialogue so far with at most ten words per speech and the rest of the representation is seen through the visuals of the two characters interacting, suspecting and their general stereotypical identity - created by a strong use of costume, hair and make-up and mise-en-scene of the guy's car. Finally, although there isn't much dialogue, there will be a good use of sound as building tension sometimes means enhancing different senses by ignoring others - therefore using the use of silence in vital points were visual focus is key.
Is there a clear tone? Describe the tone. Is it consistent throughout?
I wouldn't say that there is a clear tone, but if I were to describe the tone, it would be alternative, dark, eerie and offbeat. Offbeat and alternative tones are used as it is a social realism thriller hybrid therefore challenging the traditional norms with an unusual plot and story line. Tone is also very eerie and dark due to how strange the guy is acting and as the constant advertisement in recent society of stranger danger, everyone should therefore have some knowledge of how these situations usually pan out and this then build tension that creates a dark and eerie tone. I would say that these tones are all constant throughout the film, however I do feel that these tones are always that consistent and that they should be enhanced in order to
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